The Great Bikini Debate

I know plenty of women who hyperventilate at the mere thought of a bikini. I’ve always worn one and never thought much about it. However, on a recent trip to a family resort, I thought I was going to have a panic attack at the very sight of an itsy bitsy, teeny weeny, yellow polka dot bikini.

Okay, so it wasn’t yellow but the rest is accurate.

My anxiety had nothing to do with my own body image, but that I saw this particular bikini on the body of a little girl not much older than my second grader. And then I saw another, and another. In fact, there were miniscule pieces of fabric covering pre-teen bodies everywhere I looked. The experience made me look at my own little girl with more fear than I’ve felt before in my life; I seriously thought I might assume the fetal position and start clawing my skin while murmuring over and over again “I’m not ready!”

Before I go any further, let me acknowledge that this is a controversial subject and I make no claims or judgments about the decisions of others or the intentions of any little girl wearing a bikini. I actually witnessed a fairly nasty Facebook debate on the topic which ended with name calling and husbands defending the integrity and parenting skills of their wives. As a passive observer, I could sympathize with both sides but the reality is that it won’t be too long before I’m going to have to manage expectations about what is appropriate for swimwear, in addition to a host of other choices.

My daughter, Bailey, is a seven year-old LITTLE girl, yet there are so many images and messages encouraging her to grow up way too quickly. From the kiddie lingerie (gross) and high-heeled shoes you now see in your local stores to the fashion-focused, halter top-wearing Bratz dolls, it’s very hard to keep them doing and wearing age-appropriate things. In my opinion, how we dress is a reflection of both how we feel about ourselves and what we want others to think about us. And, I hate to think about some of the thoughts that may have been directed toward those girls I saw on vacation. Continue reading The Great Bikini Debate

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The 2011 Imaginary Family Project – Week 33

#33 of 52 : OLIVIA AND PAPA
The 2011 Imaginary Family Project Week 33

External Photo Clues:
None

A Note From Quentin:
This story was written over 25 years ago by a Grandfather, about a Granddaughter.  In April 2011 the Grandfather passed away, and the Granddaughter received the story as a gift.  This story was slightly modified by the Granddaughter, and the image selected for it, for The 2011 Imaginary Family Project.  Enjoy!

Imagine:
She has always been my favorite grandchild. Her smile can turn the worst of days into precious moments you never want to end. Ever since Olivia was two years old, her uniqueness has been apparent in her selflessness that is unmatched by any other I have ever known.

In rare occurrences, Bernadette might have known of Olivia’s existence. It is hard to say. Olivia, however, is quite aware of Bernadette, even though the two have never met and never will. For Olivia, Bernadette is an image of unknown quality known as great-grandmommy, a person who exists for her mainly because of Nani’s sadness. Bernadette is ninety-two; Olivia is six; and Nani is Claire: Bernadette’s daughter, Olivia’s grandmother, and my wife.

Claire is sad because her mother, Bernadette, has entered into the final stages of Alzheimer’s disease, and I am telling this story because I am struck by the natural empathy of a little girl who has not yet learned to harden her heart in an attempt to cope with an imperfect world. Hopefully, she will never learn. Continue reading The 2011 Imaginary Family Project – Week 33

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What makes a REAL dad?

by Michael Mitchell

I’ve written a lot on one of my other blogs on the many qualities I think of when I think about what makes a man a REAL man. Qualities like generosity, courage, simplicity, contentment, strength, and many others. And in many ways, those same general qualities also apply to being a dad.

Even so, as I’ve become more comfortable in my role as a new father, I’ve begun to ponder what it really takes to be a good father. Thankfully, I had a pretty good example in my own old man and so that’s been helpful, but (much like everything in life) I want to come up with my own set of standards for the kind of dad I want to be. With that in mind, I’ve started a list (for some reason, I’m really into lists these days) of what I think it means to be a REAL dad. Here’s what I’ve come up with so far:

1. A real dad gets on the floor and plays with his children.
2. A real dad looks for ways to add joy to his children’s lives.
3. A real dad is intentional about setting loving, but firm boundaries for his children.
4. A real dad doesn’t blow up at his kids.
5. A real dad is there.
6. A real dad is willing to drop whatever he’s doing from time to time just to be in the presence of his child.
7. A real dad protects, stands up, and fights for his kids.
8. A real dad gives his children increasingly more freedom to explore and test themselves the older they get.
9. A real dad imparts wisdom to his children.
10. A real dad is interested in the lives of his children.
11. A real dad seeks to know his children by asking lots of open ended questions without making them feel like they are being interrogated. Continue reading What makes a REAL dad?

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Red Dirt Rambler: Smokey the Bear, The Three Amigos, Okie Bambies and Ferdinand -The Hotter Than Hades Bull

Can we talk here? Don't you love the uber-retro look of older state park signs? Coming upon this particular specimen, I suddenly felt like I was driving in a 1964 Oldsmobile F-85 Station Wagon, rubber necking at the "Don't Feed the Bears" signs.
Honk, honk! "Don't feed the bears, dear!" "Okay, darling." "Thank you, dear!" "You're welcome, darling!"

 During my “Western Oklahoma, Ho!” tour, I had one ‘burning” question I really needed to investigate.  How are Oklahoma wildlife affected by the drought?

Finding the answer was a three step process.

I didn’t know it would be a three step process; I thought it would take one. One step. (I just imagined Count Dracula saying, “Von…Von Step! Ahhh-HA HA HA HA HA!”)  But I was wrong. Continue reading Red Dirt Rambler: Smokey the Bear, The Three Amigos, Okie Bambies and Ferdinand -The Hotter Than Hades Bull

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On The Horizon: FIRE!

If you’ve ever needed a fireman to put out a fire, you’ve probably never stopped to think about is he well trained? Does he know what he’s doing? Can he save my house? I know I hadn’t until I went to shoot a story over fire service training. I probably should have since my fire department is made up of volunteers. They have to be trained to keep everyone including themselves safe. But it’s something you just take for granted.

What I found out is, unless you’ve thought about a certain scenario, chances are, you’re unprepared for them. In this week’s video blog, meet a fireman who thinks about things like that to make sure his students are prepared for just about anything.

~Alisa Hines

 

On the Horizon: FIRE! from Alisa Hines on Vimeo.

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Showcasing Red Dirt culture ~ authored and managed by contributors with connections to the great state of Oklahoma.