When I learned my husband was up for a significant promotion at his work, my first instinct was—regrettably—not excitement. Instead, fear and doubt filled me.
Although the intellectual side of my brain was excited for Luke to advance his career in a job he loves, the emotional side knew it would require a great deal of his time and energy. I was anxious about how our marriage would stand up to that kind of strain and anxious about where a promotion might eventually lead. We’ve been through less-than-ideal jobs, prayers answered with “No,” and discontented dwelling in forests of question marks. We have only grown together through all of those situations, but this seemed like something new I wasn’t sure I had the skills to handle.
When I feel that kind of worry coursing through my mind and emotions, no amount of talking it out—no matter how many vanilla lattes may be involved—is going to cut it. I must write, and I won’t admit here how many journals I have filled through the years. My typical journal entry is a prayer, usually spilling out all the worries and fears crowding my mind, then making some requests about how I think the situation should be resolved. If I write long enough, I may manage to end with some form of, “…but I will be content with what You make happen because You know best.” Sometimes, that’s just how life works for us Type-A planners.
God must have known I needed a while before I could get to that place of contentment because two weeks passed before we got the results of the interview. Continue reading Not-So-Newlywed Adventures: The Great Unknown